Don’t Fall into the Disappointment Trap

I had just learned the news and I let out a little moan. My friends lost their entire investment, money that was supposed to be for their retirement years. Their hearts were flooded with a whirlwind of emotions, deep disappointment was chief among them.

Have you ever known someone who held onto bitterness, or anger for years? Most likely their negative attitude and mood is linked to something in their lives that didn’t go as they had hoped it would. Their disappointment might’ve begun with a broken relationship, a broken promise, a failed opportunity, or prayers that weren’t answered as expected.

People who hold onto disappointment are allowing the past to decide their present and shape their future. Most, of course, have no idea that this is what’s going on. I have good news. God has provided a way to move forward and a way to stay out of the disappointment trap.

We’ve all experienced the let down that happens when plans don’t turn out as hoped.
Many have been deeply disappointed through broken relationships and broken dreams.

MeandKai

Video: How to Stay Out of the Disappointment Trap

In this video, I talk about how to not let disappointing circumstances shape your future and I share with you a principle for personal breakthrough that I’ve applied to my own life, a principle that my friends (the ones who lost their investment) have walked in for years. 

Several years have passed since my friends lost their retirement money and, in that time, their lives have been dressed in wonderful opportunities that’ve brought them satisfaction and joy.

How did they go from total loss to enjoying God’s blessings?

They stayed out of the disappointment trap and they responded in a way that helped them move forward into the purpose for their lives.

There’s a way to respond when your plans don’t go as planned that will empower you to see what God has brought into your life, so that you don’t miss the blessings that He has for you. See Jeremiah 29:11.

God has only the best in His heart for you. It will take some effort on your part to live in the fullness of all that He has. It’s my prayer and confident belief that this video message will be a blessing to you and to those you love.

You are dearly loved,

Pamela Koefoed

How I Overcame being Disappointed

ButterflyYellowThere’s just no time or need to stay disappointed. This is what I’m telling myself as I navigate through news that has me feeling emotionally fragile.

Today, someone dear to me broke a promise, which means that I’m back to square one, asking the Lord to fill the cavernous space that appeared overnight when my ministry partner and best friend moved to another state, leaving a hole in my heart, chunk out of my life, and empty space beside me.

I’m sad. I just am. But I’ve decided that I won’t stay sad. This is not the end of the world, I tell myself.

Sometimes, we need to change attitudes, get tough with ourselves, talk to ourselves. Who’s your Lord? I ask myself. That always gets me in a better place–fast. Or I ask my sad self, Where have your eyes been? On man or on God? That’s also an effective perspective switcher for me. Works every time.

Most of the negative emotions that we harbor are a waste of time, of focus, and can distract us from our purpose. Sure, a devastating loss will send us on a ride that we had hoped to never take. Riding grief waves is something we all hope to avoid.

There’s just nothing that can be said to make grief go away. I wish there were words to eliminate that kind of pain. When you’re grieving, it’s tough! Disappointment is normal in such instances. For those of you who are traveling on the ocean of loss, the Lord will bring you through. He really will.

Aside from the passing of someone, the end of a love relationship, or the total loss of a dream, most of the things that disappoint us are not as devastating as our emotional responses say that they are.

What do I mean? A broken promise like I had today could send people into days of sadness. It’s a real bummer. I mean, I’m back to square one regarding something of tremendous importance to me personally and to the ministry. But it’s not equal to crying all day, or to being sad for longer than an hour or three. It’s not equal to going into a depression, or to becoming indifferent, or to throwing a fit.

Many people overreact to disappointing situations. They’ll be in self pity for days, infecting everyone around them. Some just go numb. Or they become cynical, roll their eyes, and say things like, “What did I expect?!” Or “This is how things always turn out.” Or, “It’s always something.”

When you’re disappointed, are you going to react or will you respond?

Your emotional reaction can be one like I mentioned earlier or you can be in dominion over yourself and respond with wisdom. What you do in the first few minutes of being disappointed matters, because negative emotions can drain the life out of a dream, can consume your focus, can detour your path.

How I worked through today’s disappointing news is that I chose to remember my Lord, His purpose for my life, and His ability to bring something amazing out of what feels like a loss.

Acknowledging God’s power, the magnitude of His greatness, and the limitlessness of His ability positions us to receive or accomplish something far greater than we have ever dreamed.

Listen up. If you’re going through or have been through something that has left you feeling disappointed, I encourage you to take to heart a powerful truth from Scripture.

“Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen–” (Ephesians 3:20-21).

When your trust is in the Lord, disappointments become launching pads for something better than you have imagined. Beloved, if someone has disappointed you, let you down, failed to follow through, broke a promise, changed their mind and is no longer working with you, or has ended a relationship–God is able! He is able! He is able! He is able!

Jesus turned water into wine. The Lord parted the Red Sea so that a huge multitude could cross to the other side. He provided a widow and her son with enough oil and flour to feed them during a devastating famine. He works miracles and brings forth something out of nothing.

Therefore, He can certainly do something out of your nothing, multiply your little, and provide a way for you to arrive at the center of His purpose for your life.

Take heart, receive encouragement and keep walking with the Lord, because He is working something beautiful in your life.

Talk to yourself! It works.

You are dearly loved,

Pamela Koefoed

How to Live without the Fear of Disappointment

dscn19701.jpgDisappointments can turn a great day into a woes me day. They can transform a celebration into a wake, as we mourn a loss and disappointments can really mess up our plans.

Take a meaningful relationship, for example. I’ll always remember the day, the very hour, the very moment when one of my dearest friends cut off all of her friends from her life.

We were sisters in Christ. We had traveled in ministry together. We encouraged each other to a closer walk with God. We prayed for one another’s children. I could share my heart with her and she’d pray. She could tell me anything, because she knew that I would pray. We had planned a future in ministry together.

When she shut everyone out of her life, I assumed she didn’t mean me. What a shock to learn that everyone even meant me. I lived for a while in unbelief but, as the days passed, reality hit my heart and I wept as though my friend had died. This is why I say that disappointment can change a celebration into a wake.

How to Live without the Fear of Disappointment with Pamela Koefoed

On today’s video, you can learn how to move from disappointment into the joy that the Lord has set before you, and you will obtain keys for a hope-filled life.

Those of you who have been hurt by disappointments in relationships, you can either build a wall of protection around your heart or you can leverage the disappointment to move forward.

Those of you who’ve been frustrated by disappointing work or ministry experiences, you can either live without anticipating a fulfilling work or ministry experience or you can leverage the disappointments to propel you forward.

Those of you who’ve had more than your share of disappointments, you can play it safe by keeping your distance from what potentially could end up in another disappointment… if you choose.

But are you really safe?

I mean, think about it, if you’re staying in your “comfort zone” because of something you fear then you’re most likely not fulfilling your God created purpose, which means you’re not experiencing the abundant joy of a deeply satisfying life.

On today’s video, you can learn how to move from disappointment into the joy that the Lord has set before you, and you will obtain keys for a hope-filled life.

God wants your soul to be anchored in hope. Restore hope. Restore trust. Live the life that God designed for you. Live in abundant joy.

You are dearly loved,

Pamela Koefoed