You are More Than All That — The Size of Your Body Doesn’t Define the Size of Your Worth

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My daughter is wiser than her years. One day she asked me, “What defines beauty and who gets to decide who’s beautiful and who’s not?”

Since that day when Sierra demonstrated such amazing insight and compassion, I’ve viewed physical beauty in a new light. Recently, I saw an article featuring a woman who was highlighted for being especially beautiful. She was in her twenties, somewhere around 5 feet 8 inches tall, and 100-105 pounds. Makeup was plastered on her face, and her eyes were half open in a seductive pose. Is this Beauty?

Thumb through popular magazines for women, and the adds that you’ll see will frequently feature women dressed to the nines, tall and slender. Not a hair out of place. Everything about them looks perfect. We would like to look like her. And that’s the idea. But is this Beauty?

I don’t know how it is for guys, but we gals over-stress the size of everything between our heads and our toes. From Western culture, we’ve gotten the idea that our weight and dimensions are ultra important and that they effect our value. The problem is, ask even the skinny girls, very few of us are confident with our physical appearance. In other words, who among us feels pretty?  If you do, consider yourself quite special. Really.

The struggle for image is real. I don’t get gold stars for this either. Looking in the mirror, I see who I think I am. I wish I could consider myself quite special. But I miss the mark with self confidence. Not that I struggle big time with this, but there have been days when I avoided stepping a foot outside my house lest a neighbor drive by and see me looking like I felt. Thankfully, because I’m better today at being mindful of identity and value, I haven’t had an ugly day in a long time.

I’m more concerned in you being healthy than in you looking like a run way model. I think that my views represent a whole lot of women who feel the same way. I’ve been watching for a shift in the beauty industry for the last twenty years.

Health is wealth! Of course, I mean health in spirit, health in mind, and health in body. That’s true beauty and that’s true wealth.

While we’re waiting for media trends to catch up with the rest of us who are more interested in being healthy than in plastering our faces with gooey makeup and face lifts, let’s shift our attitudes about beauty and be more focused on getting healthy, and reflecting this value to younger women and girls.

You are His beloved child. That says a lot right there. He chose you. So, that settles it.  Your worth is priceless. This is just the way it is. You have immeasurable value. In this truth is beauty. You are beautiful.

Even when you’re dressed to the nines and every hair is in its place, if you’re not centered in what God says about you then you might feel like an ugly duckling when your real identity is that of a stunning and beautiful swan. 

The ugly duckling illustrates what I’m saying here so well. Nothing about the little darling was rejection-worthy. If you’re familiar with the story, then you know that the “duckling” was actually a baby swan, but he didn’t know it. His poor self-image messed with him, causing him to devalue himself and to be depressed.

Back to my daughter’s question—What defines beauty and who gets to decide who’s beautiful and who’s not?

The young model in the beauty write up was pretty, but she looked frail. The women in the popular magazine were gorgeous. Their dresses and outfits, makeup and hair radiated glamour and wealth.

Who among us has a personal makeup artist, hair designer, clothing engineer to cater to us everyday of the week? Looking like those knock out gorgeous women isn’t real. The images that we see in the media and advertising are produced. Are you produced? Are you an image to the world made up to look like someone you really aren’t? Of course not.   And neither am I.

I’m far more concerned about you as a person than I am about your body shape, hair style and clothing. I don’t care if you’re wearing expensive designer jeans–I mean, really, aren’t there far more important issues in the world than the label on our pants? I’m concerned with how you are. Are you healthy?

Let our focus be on promoting health not counterfeit beauty. Your health is wealth. Health of spirit. Health of mind. And health of body. 

For all of my sisters, the women I’ve met and those who I’ve never met, I want you to know that being skinny doesn’t add up to being gorgeous. Beauty and skinny are not the same. The size of your body doesn’t determine the size of your worth. You are more precious than anything in this world. No matter what you feel about how you look, sister you are more than all that!

Copyright @Pamela Koefoed, 2019

How to Live without the Fear of Disappointment

dscn19701.jpgDisappointments can turn a great day into a woes me day. They can transform a celebration into a wake, as we mourn a loss and disappointments can really mess up our plans.

Take a meaningful relationship, for example. I’ll always remember the day, the very hour, the very moment when one of my dearest friends cut off all of her friends from her life.

We were sisters in Christ. We had traveled in ministry together. We encouraged each other to a closer walk with God. We prayed for one another’s children. I could share my heart with her and she’d pray. She could tell me anything, because she knew that I would pray. We had planned a future in ministry together.

When she shut everyone out of her life, I assumed she didn’t mean me. What a shock to learn that everyone even meant me. I lived for a while in unbelief but, as the days passed, reality hit my heart and I wept as though my friend had died. This is why I say that disappointment can change a celebration into a wake.

How to Live without the Fear of Disappointment with Pamela Koefoed

On today’s video, you can learn how to move from disappointment into the joy that the Lord has set before you, and you will obtain keys for a hope-filled life.

Those of you who have been hurt by disappointments in relationships, you can either build a wall of protection around your heart or you can leverage the disappointment to move forward.

Those of you who’ve been frustrated by disappointing work or ministry experiences, you can either live without anticipating a fulfilling work or ministry experience or you can leverage the disappointments to propel you forward.

Those of you who’ve had more than your share of disappointments, you can play it safe by keeping your distance from what potentially could end up in another disappointment… if you choose.

But are you really safe?

I mean, think about it, if you’re staying in your “comfort zone” because of something you fear then you’re most likely not fulfilling your God created purpose, which means you’re not experiencing the abundant joy of a deeply satisfying life.

On today’s video, you can learn how to move from disappointment into the joy that the Lord has set before you, and you will obtain keys for a hope-filled life.

God wants your soul to be anchored in hope. Restore hope. Restore trust. Live the life that God designed for you. Live in abundant joy.

You are dearly loved,

Pamela Koefoed

 

 

If You Do Nothing Else Today…

imac 27 wallpaper-308If you do nothing else today, think about what you’re most thankful for.

If you do nothing else today, sing in the shower.

If you do nothing else today, breath deep from your belly.

If you do nothing else today, walk in the crisp morning air.

If you do nothing else today, pray for your nation.

If you do nothing else today, encourage someone with a smile, or if you’re feeling really ambitious write someone an I care about you note.

If you do nothing else today, stretch your arms way up high, bend at the waist, and try to touch your toes…repeat four times.

If you do nothing else today, call someone you care about to say hello.

If you do nothing else today, tell God what you’re thankful for.

If you do nothing else today, smile more than you did yesterday.

If you do nothing else today, be generous with something…anything will do.

If you do nothing else today, dip your toes in a flowing stream of crystal clear water to remind yourself that life is more than work and responsibilities.

If you do nothing else today, give your mind a day long break from social media and the news.

If you do nothing else today, think about God’s deep and lasting love for you, for your family, and for your neighbors.

God loves you. He really does.

Live life,

Pamela

Simple and Delicious Recipes

cat-dressed-vintage-photo-Day 3 of my four-month personal challenge:

This morning, I’m sharing with you three simple recipes that Vern and I used yesterday for breakfast, lunch and dinner. If you decide to give these a whirl and don’t have an ingredient or if you don’t like something that we used, substitute it for something else in the same category or just leave it out. That’s one of the fun things about preparing meals, you can re-create recipes and come up with something new; maybe it will be even tastier than what I’ve shared.

Breakfast, whole grain oatmeal, made by my thoughtful husband. 

  • Whole grains: 1/4 cup of each ~ barley, oats, and triticale (simmered over med. heat until soft)
  • Add about a cup of old fashioned oats (stir in and simmer for 15 minutes)
  • Add 1/2 cup of raw, unsalted sunflower seeds.
  • Serve steaming hot on top of chopped green and red apples.
  • Sprinkle with cinnamon to taste. (This tasty spice is super good for leveling out blood sugar.)

Lunch, pinto beans that we washed, soaked over night, and then cooked on our wood stove. Canned food is loaded with chemicals from the inside of the can. Beans are inexpensive and easy to prepare the day before and store in the frig. This simple recipe is for one serving. 

  • We enjoy beans with about 2 tsp. of Braggs Liquid Aminos stirred into each bowl. I know the name of this product sounds a bit weird, but it’s delicious and very nutritious. It can be found at the health food section of most large grocery stores or from Vitacost.com.
  • Chopped onions, add to taste.
  • Diced tomatoes, about 1/4 cup each.
  • A dab of sour cream (small dab for me, big dab for Vern. His cholesterol numbers are excellent.)
  • Vern had cheese on top of his. (No cheese for me. That little dab of sour cream had about 1.7 grams of saturated fat, a very tiny amount. We need to have some fat in our diets. Completely fat free diets are actually unsafe. Maybe I’ll write a bit more about that in another post.)

Dinner, chicken garden salad. Recipe is listed here for each bowl. Instead of making salad in a large container, I make it as individual servings.

  • Organic romaine lettuce, washed and torn into bite sized pieces, enough to fill two large bowls about 2/3 full.
  • Add  6 – 8 cherry tomatoes, washed and halved.
  • Add about 4 tbl. cilantro, washed and chopped.
  • Chicken, about 1/4 cup, cut into pieces, and added to each bowl.
  • 1/2 avocado, sliced. (Avocado provides you with healthy fat, the kind that actually helps you burn calories.)
  • 2 tbl. Feta cheese.
  • Olive oil infused with garlic, drizzled over the salad.
  • Organic apple cider vinegar, sprinkled over the salad.
  • Organic vegetable seasoning.
  • Mixed in their individual bowls and served.

We live in a community with only one grocery store. Some of the ingredients that we use in our cooking are ordered through Azure Standard, a co-op based in Oregon. Other items are picked up when we make the hundred-mile drive to the nearest city.

I’m eager to try new recipes and I look forward to sharing them with you during this four-month journey to stronger health.

Have a blessed day~

Pamela Koefoed